Jo'burg . . . or Vegas?

I made it to Jo'burg and was greeted by a very pleasant man who guided me through the labyrinth that is the JHB international airport. Asking for the escort service was the smartest thing I've done yet on this trip--it has saved me a hundred headaches and many tears.

We found the hotel shuttle, and he carefully explained that there are three hotels here at the Emperor's Palace (formerly Caesar's Palace). I am staying at what must be the mid-priced, business-y hotel. It looks like a Hyatt on the inside, and the room is spacious but nondescript.

I decided to take a walk around the joint. The three hotels are connected by a casino and "emporium" complex that makes me think maybe I don't ever have to go to Vegas. It's entirely enclosed, of course, with a beautiful blue sky painted on the ceiling (puffy white clouds and all), "brick" flooring, central fountain, a bunch of restaurants and three spokes leading off the central hub. Each spoke is lined with eateries from the fine (with a waterfall) to the huh (Wimpy's) and ends in a noisy (if not noisome) casino. Wimpy's, I guess, is big here. There's a coffee shop that is one of a small chain here in SA (Mug & Beans), and, if I hadn't had that delicious beef stuff on the plane, I might have stopped.

Remember, please, that the only casino I have ever been in was up near Bayport, Wisconsin. It was run by some indian tribe, I think, and I only went in there because it was the only ATM for hundreds of miles. Let's just say it didn't make much of an impression--or it made a huge impression. It was no more than a double-wide trailer with walls covered in blackout curtains and a few slot machines along the walls. I may have tripped over a pool table, or it could have been the bar--who could tell? It was very, very dark in there. I couldn't even tell if they were open.

Now I see that casinos are a little bigger, a little flashier, but still, somehow, not me. I did not go in to the "adult" palaces, but I did wander around the kid's corner. Not a casino, to be fair, but an extremely noisy arcade with a dull-looking roller coaster and some unbelievably bored "ride jockey" types hanging out by the token machines.

I wandered back into the main concourse, and two things struck me: The place looks like a souped up Waveny (a care facility for Altzheimer's patients with a careful layout that gives the people there a sense of freedom but keeps them safely inside the building), and there are no people around. I saw a few people in two or three of the dozen+ restaurants, passed a guy on his way to the adult casino (he didn't look like a worker), and saw the same woman at the ATM each time I passed in the 30 minutes I spent in there.

It should also be noted that you can't find a toothbrush to save your life. I have a toothbrush, but I was looking for other sundries (like batteries), but nada. Rien. Niente.

The business center is in one of the other hotels, and it is a hot little room that must have been a coat closet at some point. The chair is as high as it gets, but the desk is so high that my elbows almost need to be shoulder high to type. The screen is even higher, and I can feel my neck cramping, so I will say adieu until Sunday. I'm supposed to be back in Cape Town late afternoon.

Oh, by the way--I am going out of order here (not continuing the Victoria Falls saga) because Day 2 has many pictures. Cheers!